The Grumpiness Tax

On a normal trip to Rutter’s Convenience Store, during one of my infamous nearly fatal chicken Quesada and frappe deficiency runs, a darker side of humanity revealed itself. I stood rooted to the spot glaring off into an undefined space when a woman approached the counter, pushing past anyone in her way, an aura of self-importance clinging to her like a weeping unreasonable sleep-deprived toddler. In her short well-polished hands, she held an object obscured wrapped in white paper baring the store’s logo. She approached the counter and slammed the object down- clearly in an obnoxious attempt to draw an employee to her aid. Behind the counter, employees, unaware of intrusion, darted mazing between obstacles of stationary carts and screaming appliances and scatterbrained staff as they prepared orders that doubled each time one finished. The woman, unsatisfied, slammed her hand upon the counter barking at the nearest employee, “Are you all stupid?”

The nearest employee stopped, and glanced at the woman. A puzzled expression painted along lines of the eyes and corners of the lips. But before the employee could respond in any way, the woman shoved the parcel in the employee’s view.

“How hard is it to make a BLT?” The woman bellowed, waving her free hand in the unfortunate employee’s face, scolding the poor soul. “You stacked it wrong! Understand. How hard is it to make a sandwich?”

I shook my head side to side, jamming a finger within the crevice of my ear. Certainly, I’d not heard that conversation correctly. I looked around waiting for John Quiñones and a few dozen cameras to jump out, or a small yellowish house to fall from the sky on top of the woman now dressed head to ankle in black. I have spent years working in that employee’s shoes, feeling the sting of customers treating me like a fly buzzing around their head, taking a swat at me every now and again. But I’d never witnessed it unfolding before me, or in that case thought of what I’d do once confronted. But here in front of me, an insane customer stood attacking a poor defenseless employee for stacking a sandwich “wrong”. How can somebody treat a stranger so poorly based on a perception of servitude?

Well, that’s hard to answer. People all around act differently take this hypothetical case for example. Imagine a simple frat party, people who (are of age, of course) engage in alcohol consumption each person at this perceived party consumes this elixir. Once consumed, some engage in sexual relations, others become angry and some spend the entire night relearning how to walk. Each person behaves in an original fashion, though they engaged in the same behavior of consuming alcohol. Now placing judgments of alcohol aside, what’s going on here? The reason inspiring these behaviors cannot simply originate from being raised without manners. Though for some that might be the case.

Companies need a different way to deal with this form of abuse while protecting their employees from emotional toll. To reiterate, sayings or mottos such as “service with a smile” and “the customer is always right” are failing the customer service industry, leaving employees defenseless. Instead of creating and spreading more mottos companies need a plan or structure. This is why I propose that to improve the relations taking place in modern day customer service interactions, a grumpiness tax needs implicated by all customer service venues.

Rude behavior not only disrupts the work place environment, it affects victimized employees who after time lose their sense of job satisfaction and suffer emotionally. As these symptoms progress, the employees feel upset or unhappy experiencing customer-employee interactions. The emotional backlash contributes to loss in productivity while the employee lacks the skills necessary to complete their job; not only affecting themselves but the employer as well. This oblivious omnipresent employer expects employees to deliver exceptional customer service, that is to retain a professional demeanor through interactions. An extremely difficult and tiring feat to maintain throughout long endless shifts. A grumpiness tax would produce many benefits in customer service interactions. Of the many benefits the employee would no longer feel intimidated by the rude and obnoxious behavior. In fact they welcome a rude customer since it produces a pleasant outcome. They would see it see it as a motivator to smile and be happy satisfying the company.

The worst crime of all is that companies allow these types of behaviors to occur because they believe in making profits despite the personal toll. They believe that if the customer leaves content, the customer will come back (or bring their friends). Some managers like Lori Locks, the store manager of the Rutter’s in the opening, believe it “[the employee’s] fault the customer was rude to begin with, as they didn’t see the smile first”. Employers blame their employees for customer’s dissatisfaction; resorting to extremes such as brainstorming employees’ exaggerated fictionalized faults that possibly caused the customers’ lack of civility. They force beliefs (like the one Lori states above) into their employees’ heads stressing “the customer pays their paycheck (Locks)”. As if an exchange of green gold gives dissatisfied customers the right to abuse a person. The theory implies that customers choose to grace the store with their presence and bestow their money on the company in exchange for goods. There is an expectation or sense of entitlement that the customer deserves the same exceptional service foreseen only within the narrow dusty chambers in that customer’s mind. Is there some truth to consider in this theory? Sure. On another hand, I’m personally not insulting anyone wielding a knife whether harmlessly slicing food or chasing after me with murderous intent. Think of the financial damage a tax would save- from simply restoring damaged property, medical care for hurt employees, adding security, and repairing a public image after customer deviance. Image the dollar amount employers spend nationwide recreating sandwiches stacked ‘wrong’.

Even employers, who are responsible for the welfare of their employees, soon will notice benefits of a grumpiness tax. Over time they will notice that productivity increases as their employees feel they have some control over customer service and they will also notice that the customers will come and spend money at their store. And if every employer implements this tax, even if the interaction cost the customers, they’d still come to spend their since they will accouter the same treatment everywhere they go. As an added bonus the more it cost customers the less inclined they’d be to replicate the behavior.

In order to protect all parties involved the company needs to give each employee a copy of the definition and company produced rules so they can carry around and memorize. In addition the company needs to invest in small microscopic cameras and microphones that attach to hats or shirts, in order to record the interaction. So when a rude customer approaches an employee, they have proof that the rudeness occurred. If the customer questions the charge of rudeness then at the end of the transaction the employee gets the chance to replay the behavior on a small screen. This makes it undeniable that the rudeness took place. Payment is expected at the time of the encounter, yet since some people do not have money on them the customer would be required to pay within 48 hours of the transaction. Also at the time of the encounter a record of the encounter needs to be record for the company’s purpose.

After this policy takes effect, new policies can monitor employee rudeness. This will be much easier to fallow since employees are already wearing the cameras. The customers who feel they are victims of employee rudeness should continue to usurer in complaints as they normally do. Management will then take care of the rest. Then after that works the grumpy policy can be applied to schools where teachers have to deal with bratty rude children. For fairness this needs to start with high schools. Then after completion of the grumpy policy in high school, it can then be moved to middle school. Once middle school is completed the policy can then move into the police force, then after that the government, finally ending with a grumpy policy for when people cut you off in your car or in lines at the grocery store. Till everyone is paying every time they are rude to another person. So, in order to begin this change it needs to start with the relations taking place in modern day customer service interactions between employees and customers. A grumpiness tax needs implicated by all customer service venues.

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